Oh no, who is it? GCHQ? MI5? The CIA?
A quick look at the screen and it’s more likely MRSA,SARS or DRSP.
Translated, that’s Methicillin-Resistant Staphylococcus Aureus, Severe Acute Respiratory Syndrome or Drug-Resistant Streptococcus Pneumoniae.
Not electronic bugs, but living microbes.
Germs trying to get at you
Millions of bacteria, fungi and viruses (the real ones) – all trying to infect you as best they know how.
And the best way is contact.
Your hands touch everything. Then you eat with them, touch your face – the germs’ easy way in.
Next thing you know it’s a cold or flu. Or maybe gut-wrenching norovirus, campylobacter or e.coli.
Inevitably something – just check your screen.
See those finger marks?
You go through the day, thinking your hands are clean, but they’re not.
Which is why the finger marks. Not just traces of grease and dirt, but visible confirmation there are germs present. Your phone is bugged alright.
Some germs are so tiny, it only takes 10 cells or so gathered together – and you’re infected.
Norovirus, for instance, or e.coli. Or dreaded Ebola, which is smaller still – your one-way ticket to serious illness.
So, germs right there, on your phone – millions of them. Any one of which could kill you if you’re careless enough.
Which means when did you last clean your phone? And when did you last clean your hands?
Because germs are everywhere, not just on your touchscreen. The whole place is bugged too.
On the TV remote, for instance – possibly the most dangerous source of germs in your whole home.
And everywhere else as well. On all surfaces. In the air.
Only you don’t know they’re there because they’re invisible.
Your hands don’t LOOK dirty, neither do all the things around you. So like all of us, you take chances.
OK, so what if you do clean your phone – scrub it down with antibacterial wipes? And you hands too – have a go with good old soap and water, singing Happy Birthday twice like the World Health Organization recommend.?
Clean, but still contaminated
All well and good.
But now you can’t touch anything, because you’ll immediately get contaminated again. The whole place is bugged, remember? And even just standing there, your hands will pick up germs from the air.
The surfaces you touch might not be so bad, maybe they had a once-over last night.
But the air?
How do you take soap and water to that?
How the heck can you be safe, particularly in the workplace – where there could be hundreds of you , all touching the same things and breathing the same atmosphere? Desks, keyboards, door handles, light switches, documents, coffee mugs, money, everything?
Only one way for sure.
Sterilise the air and everything it touches – exactly the same tactics germs use themselves.
Which means a mist-up with a germ-killer. A full-on go when everybody’s left for the evening. De-bugged, de luxe.
Not with bleach or ammonia either. That stuff will asphyxiate you in two seconds flat. They take forever to work anyway – at least 30 minutes contact time to be effective.
The stuff that works is hydrogen peroxide. Takes around 2 minutes to kill germs by oxidising them. Nixes the whole lot of them – bacteria, viruses, fungi, the lot.
As long as it’s ionised first.
That way it’s electrostatically charged so it spreads everywhere, trying to escape from itself. And the charge attracts germs like magnets – so they’re forcibly grabbed at and ripped apart by oxygen atoms.
Oh, and the other thing about ionising. It turbo-charges the hydrogen peroxide mist, making it more potent. Releases a whole slew of other antimicrobials into the air as well – hydroxyl radicals, reactive oxygen species, reactive nitrogen species, ozone and ultra violet.
Oxidised to nothing
No way any germ is coming back from that. And the whole place is now sterilised from top to bottom – all surfaces, under and behind them as well – and the air itself. Germ-free to a 6-Log Sterility Assurance Level – that’s 99.9999%, or just one cell in a million.
Of course your phone could still be bugged and trying to kill you.
The CIA have tabs on everybody these days – and the jury’s still out on whether cell phones generate enough radiation to be harmful.
And if you’ve read Stephen King’s Cell, you’ll know you’re right to be terrified.
Safer with smoke signals and carrier pigeon – as long as you keep your hands clean.