Fancy place the local Doc has got.
Done up all nice in this old Edwardian house.
Six of them in partnership, some on-the-ball practice managers to run it – even a dispensary, right there on the prem.
Too bad about the waiting rooms though.
Germs in waiting
Ten minutes in the one, and everybody gets norovirus. Walk into the other, and the sneeze hits in seconds.
Not really as bad as that, of course.
But that’s how it seems.
And if you think about it, why are you surprised?
A bunch of people all sitting, waiting – not all with aches and pains.
There’s the splutters and tummy cramps too.
Ten minutes, twenty. How long does it take?
Household hygiene, not good enough
Staring at each other in rows round the walls of this one-time ex-dining room. Carpet on the floor, drapes at the windows, radiator under the window – and that’s your lot.
Easy once-over with the Dyson when they close at 5.00. Wap, wap, with the dustcloth, job done. Exactly like public offices and waiting rooms all up and down the country.
Except there’s still stuff floating in the air. Swirling round when people come in. Settling and swirling, coming down on that old fireplace where they keep the NHS brochures. Attaching to the walls.
A grab-bag of common-or-garden cooking viruses, the usual suspects.
Rhinovirus, because it’s that time of the year. Norovirus, because the posh people in this practice do cruise ships and this year it’s Cancun with those exotic cantinas and the hot enchiladas.
You’re going to get it
A walk-in germ-factory, in other words. And a shock for the Docs that people think so.
But totally inevitable.
And totally fixable.
Hit the button, shut the door, and 40 minutes later the place is sterile.
Both waiting rooms done before going home for tea.
No viruses, no bacteria – a germ threshold at total zero.
Stop a few coughs and tummy runs, that. Save the Docs time and ease up on dispensary staff too. What’s not to like?
All for around a tenner a pop – and the patients wind up among the healthiest in the country.
Worth a bob or two in goodwill, hey?
Can we book you in for next week?